Couples, Teens, & Everyone in Between

Welcome to my practice. I am a licensed therapist offering therapy and coaching services. My office is in Manhattan Beach, California. My clientele comes from Manhattan Beach, Hermosa Beach, Redondo Beach, El Segundo, Palos Verdes Peninsula, Santa Monica, Malibu, and across California. I truly love my work. I’m passionate about helping people build richer, fuller lives, and hope to have that same opportunity with you.

Building with pine tree evening

Ted's Tips for Couples

Speak for yourself.

Let’s be honest: It just feels better to tell your partner that they’re selfish and “everyone else thinks so too.” The problem is that second part is only going to decrease the chances of a productive conversation. Conversely, i-statements — “When you leave your dish in the sink, I feel angry” — will at least increase the chance of a positive response. It requires more vulnerability to be certain, and it may feel funny at first speaking like some kind of therapy robot, but in general when our partner sees that we’re working at being more thoughtful in our communication, they’ll follow suit.

Keep it local.

In the same way that it can be tempting to invoke the opinions of others in calling out a bothersome behavior, it’s common to want to call out its pervasiveness. You’re always making us late to dinner. I feel frustrated when you’re not downstairs at the time we agreed upon.

Avoid labeling.

I must admit I’ve had to tip my cap to some of the psychologically-inspired language I’ve seen our culture produce in recent years, the apex coming when I heard someone referred to as an “emotional terrorist.” But, again, the idea is we’re seeking harmony, not war, with our partner, right? For this reason, I implore my clients to avoid making themselves God of the situation with proclamations calling out what they deem to be “rude” or “disrespectful” behavior. You’ll probably have better luck more precisely describing what irks you, like them raising their voice.

Elegance begets elegance.

If there is a common theme to the 3 tips above, it’s that there’s a cyclical nature to all of this. I think we’ve all been in a place in life where our best friend/partner/sibling/work-bestie/dog? came and apologized to us and we… were just so relieved because we wanted to be back in harmony with that person but couldn’t quite bring ourselves to be the first to extend the olive branch. Of course, all of this takes time and practice. Do not despair. If you know that — at every opportunity in a given day — you kept your communications with your partner clean, then that was a good day for you, even if your partner did not respond in kind. And of course, if you’re in couples therapy, you get to tell on them that week!

Therapeutic Services

Whether you’re seeking help for yourself, your child, or as a couple, I have received advanced trainings in the therapies that are known to have the most success treating that specific issue.

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Couples Therapy

Relationships can be both beautiful and challenging. Couples are often beset by issues related to communication, trust, or a widening emotional distance. In my work, I make use of the most proven techniques to help couples orient first toward repair and then, to flourish.

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Teen Therapy

Teens and adolescents today face tremendous amounts of pressure scholastically, socially, and athletically. In addition to or sometimes because of this, their relationships with parents and siblings can become fraught.

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Individual Therapy

The most important factor in predicting therapy outcomes is the relationship between client and therapist. For this reason, I do whatever I can to create an environment where the client feels safe to simply be his or her authentic self.

Free Consult
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Addiction Discernment

Many clients find their way to my office once their substance use has reached what I call an “eyebrow-raising” level, either to themselves or to their loved ones. From here, our task is to determine whether they are ready to address the issue with my support.

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Ted's Tips for Teens (and Their Parents)

Enforce rather than insult.

I’m consistently perplexed by how often the following happens with the families I work with: Johnny and parents will come to some kind of agreement. Johnny will depart from that agreement. Rather than simply let the consequence hit Johnny, they will rush in and save him. And by that I mean they will not take the Xbox away but insult him for not being disciplined enough to control his usage. If you said you would take the Xbox away, take the Xbox away.

Know your kid.

So many of the parents I meet have recently read a book about the negative effects of social media or gaming on teens. I’m not here to dispute that research, but rather point out: all decisions you make around this will have consequences. In the same way that giving them free rein to stare at their phone for hours could likely have serious negative consequences down the line, so too will being so restrictive that they have nothing to contribute to a conversation at the lunch table about [insert latest social media craze]. Again, ultimately I will defer to the parents’ beliefs/rules in many matters. I just see it as part of my job to encourage them to take an honest look at the cost-benefit, and not structure an entire parenting regimen, for instance, around guarding Johnny against exposure to drugs when Johnny is — on his own — completely terrified of drugs.

Validating is not agreeing.

I’m often struck by how reasonable many of the teens I work with are. Surprising, I know. On a basic level, they can acknowledge that riding an e-bike at night is objectively more dangerous than during the day and understand their parents being a bit nervous. What deadens their soul is not having (even the charade of) some say in the matter. I remind my parents it goes a long way just to say “I know it doesn’t feel fair that Parker and Peter’s parents let them ride their bikes at night and we don’t, but that’s our rule for now. Maybe sometime down the line we can revisit this.”

Reviews

I’ve known Teddy for a long time, and he’s always been a calming and steady presence in my life. He’s a great communicator, making every conversation meaningful and helpful. Teddy is non-judgmental and truly cares about people, making it easy to talk openly with him.

Brent E.

Teddy is my go to referral for young men seeking counseling. He has a unique ability to connect and relate to high school, college aged, and young adult men that makes him indespensible. His caring nature and use of empathy while helping READ MORE

Perla H.

I would, and do, highly recommend therapy with Theodore for anyone ready to make positive changes in their life through therapy. He’s skilled in tackling a wide range of issues, but his instant relatability makes him an especially good fit for high school and college age clients. READ MORE

Katie F.

Theodore is an insightful, wise counselor that provides a safe space for unpacking difficult issues and situations that cause angst or anxiety. His sincerity and calm demeanor allows for truth to penetrate the walls that have been built so that hope can breakthrough and lives READ MORE

Jill C.

Ted is my go to recommendation when it comes to dealing with the stressors in life. I have worked extensively with him through out the years to manage my anxiety with incredible results. Appreciate you Ted!

Reed T.

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